When my husband was diagnosed with a rare cancer that had already metastasized to his liver we had one friend who wouldn't accept that there was no possibility of his receiving a liver transplant.

Because the original source for his cancer couldn't be located--it was either gone, his body had rid itself of the original mass of cancer cells but not before the cancer let go of some cells and they moved to "greener pastures" OR hiding someplace and unseen even after pretty much every part of his body was scanned and scoped and biopsied.

Yes, nobody has ever heard about this but it's a thing. And nobody was going to give a man with this going on a new liver.

The friend had a brother who was an oncologist. The friend insisted that I forward my husband's x-rays to his brother so he could have a look (he meant to give us a proper diagnosis). The brother got back to our friend and explained that I had been correctly informed.

We had made a choice and wanted to believe we were doing the right thing. This friend undermined our peace of mind with each of his unasked for intrusions.

After my husband inevitably died, and I tossed the original x-rays into our garbage, about six weeks later they came back to me as the second set, now returned by our friend who'd meant to get them back to me before my husband's death. Nobody should have to handle such ugly images after they've been summarily tossed.

This friend is a really smart guy and he meant well. But his ideas caused me a lot of unnecessary turmoil. Even though I trusted our oncologist there were several weeks after I sent the X-rays off to the "bette brother" oncologist, when I had moments where I hoped "just maybe" and I believed our friendship with the smart friend was "meant to be" and a bunch of other tired old cliches worthy of quotes.

So sorry you had so many such intrusions. I' so glad you are sharing your story, maybe it will keep someone from doing this and hurting someone who is just trying to feel a grain of confidence in an impossible situation.