There is something sociopathic about a man who whips out his junk without a “whip out your junk” request. Happily, it’s never happened to me. When my daughter was 14 and at a pool party where for some reason everyone had temporarily gotten out of the pool, a boy she liked whipped his out and sort of floated it on the water. He was 14 too. My daughter, burgeoning feminist, asked him what the hell he thought he was doing, got out of the pool and told every single kid that came back to the pool area that they might want to think twice about getting in the water again…because “Tony was playing with his dick in it.”

Tony was never more unpopular…

And congratulations for a VERY funny article and keeping up with your dog photograph model.