I think widowed folks, who deserve a chance to find another relationship in their lives, need extra insight and empathy. Everyone grieves differently and on their own timeline. For anyone to say "too soon" might be a judgement, especially when it is applied to someone whose situation you might not be fully aware.

I was widowed in my 40s. Losing my husband turned my world upside down. I dipped my toes into the dating world after about two years. There were a lot of ways I wasn't really ready (the emotional component was at the forefront) but I reasoned if I didn't get out there when I did I might not ever.

I got very little understanding and empathy. Usually, the guy came with his own agenda, mine be damned. Never had a man from match or eharmony ask me about my loss or even my 24 year long happy marriage.

Instead, I got to listen to a lot of bitter Barney's griping about their ex wives.

I ended up falling in love with a widower. When we met he hadn't even been without his wife for a year. There was a definate spark and since I'd been out in the dating world for a bit, I knew he was a keeper.

So, we started our relationship as he continued (and I continued) to work through our grief. We've forged a great relationship, understanding that the bottom line is our support of each other. I helped him raise his young daughter and he's been instrumental in my financial security.

I think if you are going to take issue with things like pictures there or missing maybe you aren't such a good match for a widower.

If a liar lies about smoking, I don't think it has anything to do with his having suffered a loss. In that respect he's just another lyin' man.